Overcoming Obstacles
The time after birth is full of potential obstacles. It seems unfair that so much happens at one time: the stress and excitement of birth, post-labor recovery, the sleeplessness that comes with a newborn and the often completely new practice of breastfeeding—the initial latching on, milk production and getting the supply regulated. Thankfully, lactation consultants are increasingly included in women’s post-partum hospital care, and there are groups online and in real life for breastfeeding support.
There are challenging forces at work in the beginning and women who are ambivalent about breastfeeding often quit. It can be physically painful, latching can be difficult and the milk supply can be too much or too little. With all of the emotions and physical exhaustion, it’s not a great time to learn a new skill.
There are also social issues: being uncomfortable breastfeeding in front of other people, the pressure of being responsible for the baby’s well-being and reluctance to ask for help for this supposedly “natural” activity. For women of this generation, there’s an additional challenge because their mothers and mothers-in-law often did not breastfeed—the rates in 1972 dipped to only 22 percent—and they don’t have that hands-on experience to share.
A Good Support System
If your partner, family and friends know that breastfeeding is important to you, it helps a lot. They can support you emotionally with encouragement, and physically with time and space to breastfeed—and they can always bring you a glass of water, a key ingredient!
A Good Pump
If you need to be away from the baby at all, particularly for work, you need a good pump. A professional-grade pump was a great investment seven years ago. It’s kept my milk supply steady and saved money. But, I’ve had to lug it around and be questioned by TSA about it. I’ve also had it spill open while running for a bus—which was so embarrassing. But it has its surprises, too. I was pumping in a bathroom once and a woman said over the stall, “I know that sound! How old is your baby?” and we had a nice chat at the sink afterward.
But mainly, pumping is lonely. It doesn’t involve your baby—it involves an uncuddly machine with a motor, and that takes some getting used to. It’s the cost of having the milk for when the baby needs it. Despite growing awareness of the needs of nursing mothers, there are still lots of places where you may need to be creative about where you pump: restaurants, airports or conferences. In fact, I got over the pump paranoia and resigned myself to pump when I need to, wherever I can. It’s either that or tank my supply, so that means pumping in my car. Sometimes I’d pull over and pump in vacant parking lots. When I had a job where I traveled a lot, I pumped in gross airport bathrooms and even airplane bathrooms (oh, yes, the turbulence feels worse there). I’ve even pumped while driving (hands free, though). And during those times, I felt ridiculous and wondered, “Why am I doing this?”
I was pumping in a bathroom once and a woman said over the stall, “I know that sound! How old is your baby?”
Determination
Before I had kids, breastfeeding wasn’t something I thought much about. During pregnancy, I learned about the benefits of breastfeeding for me and my baby. Then I met my very thirsty son, and once I got the hang of breastfeeding him, I really enjoyed it. I set a goal of six months, and then just kept going. We worked down to one feeding in the evenings at 14 months. When my second son weaned at nine months, I was very sad. (I’ve since learned that this is a very distracted age and feeding them in a quiet room can help them stay focused.) Now, on my third time around, we are still going strong. My determination helped me stick with it when it was really hard—and now I just enjoy having that nourishing bond with my son. We’ll keep going until it isn’t, as the AAP says, “mutually desired.”
A Good Sense of Humor
A sense of humor is crucial. Sometimes you end up breastfeeding in the planetarium, the physics section of the bookstore, or pumping in the McDonald’s parking lot with a newspaper held up to shield you. It can be isolating, but you can laugh and share stories with other moms. You can discuss flange sizes, the Australian hold and taking cold medicine. And you can feel like you are not just bringing home the bacon, you are bringing home the milk, too!