On September 10, Tracey Hunnicutt and a cadre of family and friends will participate in the annual Out of the Darkness suicide prevention/awareness community walk in Virginia Beach, Va.. They have done so every year since 2009, the year Hunnicutt’s youngest daughter Chelsea took her own life.
The 2016 National Suicide Prevention Week occurs Sept. 5-11. For “Team Chelsea” the Walk is about remembering and celebrating her life and the lives of others who have been through a similar tragedy.
“It was a typical Monday morning,” Hunnicutt remembers. “Chelsea was running late and I was nagging her about missing the school bus. I still can’t believe that my last words to her were to nag.”
By late afternoon on that spring day, the family’s world turned upside down when Hunnicutt came home from work to find her youngest daughter had committed suicide. “As a mother, I will struggle with this for the rest of my life,” she says. “Chelsea was the bubbly, silly girl. In school, she got along with everyone – the jocks, the nerds, everyone.”
The Lafayette High School senior was born and raised in Williamsburg, Va., and had hundreds, if not thousands, of friends. She was a beautiful, popular and witty girl. Close friends say that everything was normal that day at school and that Chelsea was looking forward to shopping for a prom dress.
“How did I not see this coming?” Hunnicutt asks. “How could I not know that my daughter was depressed?”
In the weeks following Chelsea’s death, Tracey returned to her job at Ft. Eustis. She also sought grief counseling. “My therapist encouraged me to take time minute by minute. A day or even an hour can be overwhelming, so I took it one minute at a time.”
Time slowly passed and the family moved on, as best they could. They sold the house Chelsea died in. Hunnicutt has changed paths professionally and is now working in Northern Virginia. Her eldest daughter Amber lives in New York City where she is currently a graduate student at NYU.
“I’ve worked hard to start a new life but this is something you never get over,” Hunnicut says.
In the case of suicide, devastation is compounded by the suddenness and the act itself. Those left behind are left to struggle with terrible grief as well as questions that have no answers. Over the years, Hunnicutt has channeled her own grief into advocacy, in hopes of raising awareness about depression.
“There is no way to know for sure whether or not Chelsea was bi-polar, but in the days and weeks following her death, things surfaced that pointed to depression.”
Under the best of circumstances, the teen years can be difficult, and Chelsea had faced some disappointments. She put a smile on her face and kept everything inside, Hunnicutt says.
“Depression is an illness,” Hunnicutt adds. “Just like heart disease or cancer, except people judge us if we are depressed, so we hide depression.”
Teenagers are especially at risk because they might not know where to turn for help in dealing with feelings that are dark and unfamiliar to them.
“Sometimes a child will confide in a close friend who promises not to tell,” Hunnicutt says. “They think that ‘telling’ would be disloyal. I want to say this to anyone in that situation: please try and get your friend help. Talk with a counselor or another adult you trust.”
According to The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, more than 42,000 people in the United States die by suicide each year. It is this country’s 10th leading cause of death. “If I can raise awareness about depression and suicide and reach just one person – then Chelsea has played a part in that.”
Out of the Darkness is now in its 11th year in Virginia Beach. The national sponsor for the event is the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP); the local sponsor is the Hampton Roads Survivors of Suicide Support Group. Local companies donate food and services. All proceeds go to The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
“It’s a day of compassion, healing and hope for those affected by depression and suicide,”
Hunnicutt says. “Their mission is to bring the treatable disease of depression and the tragedy of suicide out of the darkness into the light. Since 2009, my friends have supported our family and others like us in this way.”
That first year after Chelsea’s death was not easy but Hunnicutt was grateful for the showing of support from family, friends and colleagues. “Team Chelsea” has grown.
“Every year we have more people involved. It’s like therapy to me. Friends and family come out, and it just feels so good. There are kids from Lafayette High, some of Chelsea’s former teachers from Williamsburg, people from the School of Education at the College of William & Mary where I used to work, and former colleagues from Ft. Eustis.”
Meals are provided, as well as an array of activities and musical entertainment and on-site counselors for those who want to talk to a professional.
“It’s truly a community undertaking,” Hunnicutt says. “Since we began, we have raised thousands of dollars for AFSP. In addition to the Walk itself [and there are three routes from which to choose, all under two miles], the event consists mostly of fellowship.”
The gathering has turned into one of the highlights of Hunnicutt’s year. “I am so busy trying to get out there and greet people,” she says. “We walk to foster awareness about depression and suicide. We walk for those who have been through the grief and sadness of suicide leaves behind. We walk because our lives will never be the same. We walk to keep Chelsea’s memory alive.”
Want to go?
When:
Saturday, September 10, 2016, check-in: 8:30 a.m.
(Severe Weather Date: September 17, 2016)
Where:
Mount Trashmore, 310 Edwin Drive, Virginia Beach
Registration and other details at http://www.sos-walk.org/sos/